Metallica was in town last night. Unfortunately, I couldn’t go because “24″ was on. In an unusual move, I’m offering two versions of “Master of Puppets”. If you can stand a few f-bombs, head on over to the main place for a classic version from 1989; otherwise, stick around for a subdued Alternica version...

• Kathy Carpenter compares and contrasts the attitudes toward the government bailout among the various current-governor GOP candidates for the 2012 nomination. There is a shocker there that Michelle Malkin picked up on; that’s all I’m going to say.
• Now They Tell Us, Part I - Jim Geraghty found CNN admitting that Barack Obama is looking like a different President than the candidate he posed as.
• Now They Tell Us, Part II - Amanda Carpenter is shocked, SHOCKED The News Organization That Cannot Be Quoted™ waited until just before Sen. Hillary Clinton’s (D-NY) Secretary of State confirmation hearing begins (or began, depending on how fast I can finish this up) to reveal her Chicago Way bona-fides.
• Speaking of the Chicago Way, doubleplusundead found a couple of potential Mobsters/future Senators (what’s the difference?) practicing the Chicago version of the Good Samaritan (or at least the robbers who preceded the Samaritan).
• Back to Obama - Jim Lynch “borrowed” an advance copy of his Inauguration speech. Trust me, it’s an instant classic.
• Steve Hayward outlines my fears that Obama will be the 5th FDR term.
• Shoebox wonders how the NAA(L)CP could be so economically blind. It’s either the pastels or the decided lack of red amongst the belles.
• GayPatriotWest identifies a severe case of Jeff Gannon Disease among the Obama press corps organs.
• Warner Todd Huston brings news that bloggers are now credentialed media in the eyes of the NYPD. I wonder whether it was the suit those bloggers brought against the NYPD or the possibility that the New York Times will fold this year that caused the change of heart.
• V the K found another brilliant example of spelling and grammar from the anti-Semite crowd. A missing “s” not quite as classic as the “Juice” episode, but it is very illustrative of the current state of education.
• Jim Hoft has Exhibit Number 1,432,243 in the decline and collapse of “Great” Britian - the police are being chased off by Islamists, who correctly call them “cowards”.
• Shoebox exposes the reason why the Not-So-Big Three is now pushing for higher gas taxes. I’m reminded of how GM got the catalytic converter mandated while they had a stranglehold on the market.
• The quote of the day comes from Doug Powers’s take on the call from Obama to delay the final step in the transition to digitial TV - “In this arena, the government has once again made the Three Stooges look like the U.S. Marine Corps Silent Drill Team.” Since I don’t want to disappoint the Marines, here’s the Marine Corps Silent Drill Platoon…

  What, you were expecting the Stooges? Okay.

• The runner-up comes from doubleplusundead’s news of the latest RINO Senate cave - Orrin Hatch (”R”-UT) acceptance of Eric “Pardons For Sale” Holder as Attorney General - “Who needs enemies when you have friends like this?”
• If only they would take AWR Hawkins’ advice and ignore the 3 ‘Rat Rules of Politics.
• Lance Burri wants gridlock instead of bailouts. After the veto-proof approval of a $10 billion land grab that oh-so-”conveniently” restores a major portion of the drill ban and the item 2 spots above, I’m not hopeful.
• Flip proves that the natural extension of gridlock, Congress not being in town, is far better for the economy. 43 years of history cannot be completely wrong, especially when the difference is better than an order of magnitude.
• Kevin Jackson proves that being poor pays.
• Nick Schweitzer found the true lesson of a “Green” stunt pulled by a freshman Congresscritter - alternate fuels are not ready for prime time.
• JammieWearingFool found an early candidate for Worst Father of the Year. I guess all those involved were just doing business transactions that legal Americans refuse to do when the father sold his daughter off for marriage in exchange for a promise for money, beer and meat. Bonus chutzpah - Papi went to the police to get his daughter back when his son-in-law didn’t cough up all the dough.
• Your Health Minute, Part I - Christian Schneider links corn subisides, poor health, and calls for socializing health care like we did farming.
• Your Health Minute, Part II - Lance Burri links socialized health care and government-mandated diets. I guess my mantra of not wanting to live forever, much less living forever on somebody else’s dime is out of vogue.
• Adam found a show “ripped off” by “24″.